RE: RE: Dear: SA FM
OK I get it. You probably get thousands of emails a day from people who think they can change the station with vague ideas such as “don’t play shit music” and you may be thinking “oh it’s all well and good to sit atop your high horse and give orders. Come do what we do.” Then allow me to do a rapid dismount. My ideas include:
Less Akon more Dre: Tell Akon to give it up. Dre did it better with ‘Bitches Ain’t Shit’. He wasn’t trying to get on their good side during the corporate hours by telling them they’re “Sexy Bitches” then come evening trying to slip it in while they slept. I’m on to him.
Less Chris Brown more T-Pain: One likes to give a solid beat down. One likes to cruise on boats. I know who I’m going to the afterlife with.
Less Jessica Mauboy Less Guy Sebastian More Shannon Noll More Lisa Mitchell: Nothing good can come of reality TV. Unless it’s Paradise Hotel, that show was great. Perhaps if the premise of Australian Idol was “Let’s give them something to sing for: Their LIFE.” Same deal, except whoever’s in the bottom 3 would go one-on-one with a great white or perhaps a panther. The survivor then gets to come back and do it again the following week. I guarantee you contestants would give 110% to their song choice and we’d get to weed out the Damien Leith’s of the world nice and early. Actually pretend you didn’t read this, I am going to pitch this to Channel Ten. In the meantime play more “Big Black Shiny Car”, that song is hilarious.
Less ‘Better Man’ more ‘Do The Evolution’: Did you know that Pearl Jam have a whole back catalogue of songs on albums? Feel free to play one of them. This also applies to Nirvana ‘Smells Like Teen Spirit’ and ‘Come As You Are’.
Less ‘Haileys Comet’ more ‘Sussidio’: Every time you feel your hand go to the PLAY button ask yourself “Is today the day?” So is today the day that one person flips out from a comet overload? If the answer is “possibly” then quickly go to the emergency programming of Phil Collins – Sussudio or John Farnham – Playing to Win.
Less Lady GaGa more Peaches: Hey GaGa, Peaches called. She wants her look and demeanour back. Whenever you’re ready.
Less Newton Faulkner more James Blunt: If you don’t know this already, I do not rate James Blunt. Check him for a vulva I say. But Newton Faulker is the new Blunt. Who was the new Enrique Iglesias. Who was the new Marc Cohn. Who was the new Rick Astley. Pattern? As there were many before him, so shall there be many after him. Should I take solace in the fact that in 2 months time when “Steve Jones” releases the hit “Baby Girl I’m Gonna Lay You Down And Enter You” which will take the easy listening chart by storm, I will probably be praying for a little “Dream Catch Me”?
How am I doing so far? Do you require more ideas? Don’t bite off more than you can chew, digest these first and then I’ll feed you more in due course. (Too much with the food metaphor?)
http://www.safm.com.au/contact Sent 02/11/09
